because hell is here on earth right now

I still own my house. We were supposed to close today. key words: supposed to

So the buyers were supposed to go in at 9am. But the guy had a class at 9 (and he didn't know this MONDAY?). Title company couldn't accomodate them until 4:30. Bad omen #1

My realtor called to tell me this and we both talked about our superstitions about the sale. She said she never takes her sign down or takes the lock box until about an hour before the close if she can help it. I told her that we had to move the sign when we moved out b/c it was in the way of the truck. Bad omen #2

I decide to leave a little early to get to the title company. Brian was picking up the kids and I figured I could probably sign my name where needed and watch them while he signed his name. About 10 minutes away my realtor calls.

Don't.come.the.guy's.driver.license.is.expired.and.his.passport.is.from.a.different.country.so. they.
won't.
close.
today.

mother fucker mother fucker mother fucker mother fucker

Story behind the driver's license: in the state of TX, things may be bigger and better, but in this case they are delusional. If you have an out of state license and you go to get a new one, you must surrender your license to them. Then after you do that they tell you it will take 2-3 weeks to get your new TX license and they send you home with A PIECE OF PAPER that is supposed to be your identification. No lie - in this day and age, TX somehow hasn't figured out how to give you a piece of plastic with your picture on it the same day. Blows my mind.

He has a piece of paper that shows that he went in to get it on Dec. 29th but he put his new address on it. He went to our house to see if it was there (nope). Tried to go by the license store, closed (yeah, asshole - get to the closing on time and MAYBE we'd be done with this shit!). So tomorrow they get to tour the city of Houston to hunt down his driver's license.

Meanwhile, I still own my house.